27 Things I've Learned at 27
I’m 27… I still feel like my 21st birthday was last year, my kids born yesterday, how in the world is 30 so close?! I previously wrote 24 Things I’ve Learned at 24, and I thought it was time for an update! Some of my close friends are expecting their first baby and my younger family members are experiencing high school, first loves, or moving out - it all has inspired me to once again share the things I’ve learned that I wish I would have known then. Our twenties are such a time of deep personal discovery, there are so many paths, so many mistakes, yet so many positive if you choose to see them.
I still love this quote so I’ll bring it back:
If you wanted to go back to school at age 27, realized it was going to take five years to finish, so you decided not to. You will still age five years whether you decide to do what you wanted to do or not.
So here’s to ‘doing the damn thing’ and loving your life!
1. Start that self love journey
If you haven’t already, it’s time to begin your journey to self love. Especially if you are a mom. We (moms) often put ourselves on the backburner, but it’s time to start prioritizing our own healing. Taking care of yourself has a ripple effect on everyone in your life. Although I think it’s important to do this for ourselves, we can also think of the little minds in our lives that may look up to us. For me, it’s my younger brother, cousins, and my children. I want them all seeing me love myself, be unapologetically confident, and encourage others to be too. You can only love others as much as you love yourself. Have you ever looked back on old pictures and thought “wow, how did I think that about myself back then?” I know I have. So if I feel like I was just what I needed to be then, why not think that now, why waste all that time having such negative energy about myself instead of embodying self love.
2. Let go of perfection and embrace everyday joy
This one comes from a book I read last summer “The Gift of a Happy Mother: Let Go of Perfection and Embrace Everyday Joy”. This can be taken so many ways, and that’s the beauty of it! For me, it’s my house. Why should I waste my children’s childhood worrying about a perfect house, a perfect schedule, etc. Now I choose connection over chores. Another way I think about it is how I constantly wish we could travel. It’s just not in our budget right now, so instead of feeling down about it I find ways to ‘adventure’ closer to home. Instead of thinking about how I have another mess to clean or another day of dishes, it’s becoming easier to think about how many things were being learned with those toys and how lucky we are to connect through home-cooked meals.
3. Invest in your hobbies
Going along with tip #2, letting go of certain expectations for me has allowed myself time to invest in my hobbies. I grew up in a generation that was big on ‘hustle culture’. So my mindset was very centered around how I could make money from my hobbies - instead of just enjoying a hobby. The more I changed my mindset and just allowed myself to create, the happier I became as a person. I also love to be able to show my children how I make time for my hobbies, and how we can all take turns supporting each other in their hobbies.
4. What/Who you surround Yourself with will be who you become
This tip is not the same as ‘remove anyone who does not entirely agree with you’. I think having friends with differencing opinions, different parenting approaches, different hobbies, is what allows us to be so open minded. However, if they are so vastly different that it is turning you into a different person, they probably aren’t meant for you. I have found that surrounding myself with like-minded friends has allowed me to grow, build confidence, enjoy hobbies outside of being a mother, and so many other amazing benefits.
5. Ask for help
You. Can. Ask. For. Help. This one is something I have learned after having my first child. It’s hard in the beginning to start asking for support. Once you move past the pride-inflicting feelings, you realize how much relief comes with allowing yourself to get the support you need! For me, this was making sure my family is putting in an equal amount of effort into the home maintenance, having enough hands to help out after the birth of my second child, and making time for the kids and I to get out of the house. While we are out of the house, I try to go with other friends so we can each take a turn watching the kids and doing something we enjoy (a five minute swim in the lake, talking a calming walk, painting, etc.).
6. Choose Kindness
Choose kindness. This has been the biggest mindset shift for me these past couple years, and I love it. There have been some people in my life that just embodied light and kindness, it has been my priority to turn into that type of person.
7. Get comfortable with being uncomfortable
I’m in an era of self-love where I am allowing myself to FULLY be myself. I’m immersing myself in situations that make me uncomfortable, practicing speaking up, learning to be assertive, and trying to learn not to care what others think. PHEW I said it. Trying to learn not to care what others think. I’m not sure if I will ever accomplish that last one, but I’m going to try! When you force yourself into uncomfortable situations for the sake of being a better person, you’ll become one.
8. Fresh air solves a lot of problems
Seriously. A walk outside can make your whole day better. Meeting with a friend? Have them meet you at a trail and talk while you walk, you’ll be surprised how good it feels at the end both for your mind and body. Kids being a little ~extra~, take them outside - you’ll both feel better.
9. Where focus goes, energy flows
In other words, your life is directly controlled by what you focus and put your energy on.
10. How can we change the negative
LOVE this quote from a hike leader I met this 2024 year. We had just made it through the most difficult part of the hike and she stopped us to say “I think it’s so important to note here, how can we change the negative?” Our hike was about to be all uphill back to the top where our cars were. In anticipation of our minds turning more towards ‘this hike is so difficult’, ‘I don’t think I can make it to the top’, ‘my legs are so weak’. Instead, we think ‘my legs are so strong to carry my body this far’, ‘I’m getting stronger’, ‘I can’t wait to eat my snack in the car’. Obviously, those examples were all on fitness but the same can be true in any situation. My new favorite motherhood example is for the first thing you say to your child to be something positive. They came muddy into the door and instead of crying and complaining, simply say “wow, I’m so happy to see you!” then worry about the cleaning task. Your kid just made a big mess, “this spot in the house is going to be so clean when we are done.”
11. Happiness is not found by searching but by living
This is a quote from another great book, “The Finnish Way.” Simply put, stop scrolling and comparing your life. If you are consuming digital media more than you are creating (not necessarily on social media), then start putting the phone away and take a break from the TV. It’s time for us all to just start living our lives! I know there’s a movement to go back to slow living, homesteading, and cottage lifestyles and I am 100% on that trend - but I started this lifestyle long before it became a trend and I think it truly is important for our overall health.
12. The Four agreements
I may be a little late to reading this book, but I love what it has to say.
1. Be impeccable with your word.
2. Don’t take anything personally.
3. Don’t make assumptions.
4. Always do your best
- don Miguel Ruiz, The Four Agreements
13. Call your parents
Call someone and tell them you love them. You’ll be surprised how important it is! It may seem a little extreme for us, but I call my parents just about every morning. The mornings I don’t call them, I’m calling my grandparents. I think it has really helped all of our relationships, too.
14. Learn to play
Don’t forget, it’s okay to still be a kid. I never realized how much I needed and missed childhood until I was camping with friends and they all joined our kids playing on the playground. I realized right then, that I needed to play too. Needed true, belly laughs. Needed to allow myself to be silly.
15. Put the phone away
hahahaha…. This one is HARD. As a digital creator trying to prioritize family time, how do I just leave my device?! I recently got a smart watch so I could still respond to important messages while leaving my phone in another room (sometimes forgetting where I’ve placed it entirely).
16. Don’t feel guilty for things to enjoy
I often feel sooo guilty for sitting down and writing an article or spending my weekend working an art fair instead of spending time with my family. Now I tell myself that it is equally important for them to see me enjoying what I do and investing in my time and business.
17. Don’t skip the stretches
Like seriously, don’t skip the stretches. Warm your body up before every exercise, stretch afterwards, and stretch often. Stretching will help with mobility in the future too! I hope I never lose this young mom energy and plan to keep up with my mobility exercises!
18. Don’t over think it
Biggest motherhood advice I can give. Your kids don’t need a schedule of activities, itineraries, Pinterest worthy meals, and bucket list summers. They need time and space to just be kids, they need ‘yes’ spaces, time outside, and most importantly, time with you.
But also, don’t over think anything in life. I’m still learning this one, and I think I’m getting pretty good at it!
19. Collect moments, not things
The more things you have to clean and organize, the more cluttered you will feel. It’s better just to skip the souvenir and save the money on more experiences. Your children don’t need as many toys as you think they do, they would rather be throwing rocks in a river or lake. I prefer to create memories instead of collecting things.
20. You’ll never regret spending time in a good book
I’m such a slow reader… but I love reading! I love reading historical fiction, fantasy, self-help, and parenting books. Each year I try to push myself more in my reading abilities. I don’t think its about how many books you read in a year either. Think of it more like quality over quantity. Are you reading something you enjoy? Then keep doing it! Are you not enjoying it? It’s okay to close the book and try a different one.
21. Record your life
Record it however you feel comfortable! For me, it’s this blog and my YouTube channel. I know it’s more important to live in the moment, but I just love documenting my life! Take the pictures, make the videos, keep the scrapbook, however you want to do it, just do it.
22. It’s never too late to start
If there’s anything I’ve learned from the big business people of the world, it’s never too late to start. Build a business, start a new hobby, learn a new skill, go back to school, it’s never too late.
23. Don’t live with regrets
Right in line with #22, don’t pass up a moment because you think you can’t. I don’t want to reach the end of my life and worry about all the things I wish I would have done instead of worrying about what others may think or how badly I may fail.
24. Communication is Key
This goes for parents, partners, family, friends, colleagues, workplaces, and more. Knowing how to communicate, communicate effectively, and in a healthy manner is the biggest life win. Being able to communicate is almost as important as the content of what you wish to communicate. I think the world can learn a lot from gentle parenting and how to effectively communicate through those same parenting tactics.
25. Coffee Overstimulates me
I said this was a list of things I’ve learned - they don’t all have to be deep! Haha
A surefire way to turn me into mean mom is by drinking a cup of coffee. Even though I love coffee, I’ve given it up to be a better me. I still drink tea (two-three cups because it’s just not strong enough) but I’m no longer overstimulated and a little more willing to take on adventures than I used to be.
26. A calming playlist in the background is good for my mental health
WHAT? Yep. I’m an anxious mom, easily over stimulated - BUT, a calming playlist in the background somehow does not send my noise stimulation limit through the roof. If fact, it does the opposite. And dare I say, it helps keep my kids calm too? Don’t get me wrong, we still have our crazy moments! But between becoming the best mom I can be, making space for my family, and calming music, we haven’t had tantrums or sibling fighting. If I need a moment, I’m able to calm down by listening to the music and remember my priorities. It’s been such a blessing!
27. Your house is not a storage unit
We already heavily believe this one. But it wasn’t until I pulled out a tub of hand-me-downs that had never been pulled out while my child was that size, I realized we had an issue. Our storage in the home is already small (a little larger than a walk in closet), so that should tell you a lot right there. After that moment, I pulled out all the kids clothes and made the tubs we were storing them in even smaller. Now everything is neatly organized in a tub, the tub is labeled the size it belongs to, and all the extras are in our local consignment finding new homes while we make a little side change.