How To Take Care of Your Body After A Miscarriage
A miscarriage can cause long-lasting changes on a person’s body, mind and spirit, being felt deeply for an undetermined amount of time. It can affect a wide area of life for someone and their partner. A miscarriage can breach a sense of self-trust and self-compassion one might have had with their body. But when it comes to healing, there is no one path so be sure to explore all forms until you find something that calls to you. I will be sharing things that really helped me during this time of tenderness. What I did to cope might not work for everyone, so be sure to talk to your medical staff and trusted relationships to find what works best for you.
Continue taking your vitamins
Even though your pregnancy will not continue, it’s imperative to continue taking care of your body. One of the many ways to do that is by continuing your prenatal vitamins, or alternative vitamins. Your body will be going through some major hormonal changes, as a body does anytime it goes from pregnant to not pregnant. By continuing your vitamins, among other lifestyle choices, can lesson the physical and mental symptoms of hormonal imbalances.
Rest
You and your body just went through something incredibly traumatizing. It is best to prioritize rest, if you can. If you are able to, take two weeks off of work or any responsibility. If you are not able to take the time off, try to reach out to your boss and see if there’s any ways to lesson responsibilities for two weeks to give you the mental release while recovering. Jumping right back into things will be incredibly difficult and tiring on you. I found even the smallest task tiring and spent much of my time relaxing with my daughter, enjoying audiobooks or podcasts, meditating, and reflecting.
Get out in nature
Science has already proven how beneficial time in nature is and how it’s an amazing antidote for stress. Time in nature improves your mood, reduces feelings of stress or anger, helps you feel more relaxed, improves mental health, improves confidence and self-esteem, helps you be more active, and so much more. Nature is the perfect healing medicine and in such a venerable time, could prove to be an amazing tool in your healing process. I’m grateful I was able to get out for daily walks or hikes. When I found a cloud hanging over my head, I packed up my daughter and we headed to a trail. At some point during our time outside, my cloud would leave and I’d be ready to tackle the rest of the day.
Eat for your body
Just as continuing your vitamins can help lesson the symptoms of your hormonal changes, so can eating for your body. Each person and body is different, so just as there is no one way to heal there is no one way to eat. You should really focus on eating for your body, your natural cycle, and your health overall, but most importantly during this time. Eating within your own personal calorie range and focusing on foods most beneficial for your cycle time, can help maintain hormonal balance.
Practice skin care
This was my personal form of self-care while I was healing. I continued my skin care routine every day. In doing so, I gave myself routine and a sense of control over my day which can help immensely in a time where you feel you have no control. With all the hormonal changes, you may see a major difference in your skin health just as we would during a menstrual week. Using a gentle cleanser, avoiding makeup, using sunscreen, and your other skincare items can help address potential breakouts, clogging, and other skin complexities that come with the significant drop in estrogen and progesterone levels.
Allow yourself to grieve
Give yourself permission to grieve, to express all the emotions and internal anguish, you deserve to be able to let it all out. The body needs to be free to express our emotions, not hide them, feel ashamed for them, or think we are being strong by locking them away. They are what they are, they are natural, they happen, and it’s healthier to allow them to happen in response to what we lost. When we suppress our emotions, whether for ourselves or from others, it can lead to immense physical and mental stress on our bodies. It directly affects blood pressure, memory, and self-esteem. If we have other loved ones in the home, like I have my husband and daughter, hiding our emotions from them can cause relationship strains. Hiding your emotions from your partners and children can lower relationship quality, diminish responsiveness, lessen other’s self-confidence in your relationship, break trust, and so many others. Our partners and children need to be able to see us in all of our emotional authenticity, emotional regulation, being open and discussing our emotions, and it benefits all parties involved.
Healing yoga for the mind
I know I said to rest, but that doesn’t mean you have to sit still all day. Doing some gentile yoga can be so beneficial for your body and your mind during this time. Whether you are putting on your favorite yogi to follow the video, or seeking out a specialized instructor for trauma-informed yoga and meditation, yoga can directly address those changes to the brain and nervous system using breathing and movement. I implore you to find the time to prioritize this during your healing process. Some of the benefits can include: improved concentration, focus, attention, reduced anxiety and anger, reduce the impact of exaggerated stress responses, improve emotional regulation techniques, assist with relaxation, sleep, and mood, allow access to pauses between reactivity and responses to regulate behavior.
To prioritize time for my body and mental health, my husband and I decided to alternate bed time routines. During evenings where it was his turn to put our daughter to bed, I would put my favorite yoga instructor on the TV and go through a practice. I’m still seeing the benefits and I get time to myself as a busy mother. See if there’s a way you can prioritize this in your day, whether it’s waking up a little earlier, practicing after the kids go to bed, or rearranging your schedule to allow time for your mental health.
Gentle Affirmations
Affirmations are a powerful tool in healing and to help find inner peace. One way to heal your heart is by replacing the negative self-talk with positive affirmations such as:
I forgive my body.
I trust my body.
My body is doing everything it is designed to do.
I am worthy.
My body is capable.
My womb doesn’t limit the mother in me.
I will trust my body and let it decide.
I will trust nature.
I deserve the happiness I am receiving.
I will let others help me.
Help from others doesn’t make me weak.
My body is not incomplete, it is capable in all terms.
I will exhale the past and inhale the future.
I will release all the negative thoughts that do not allow me to try my chances.
Trust in your body
This one is going to be easier said than done, I know. Your body did what it was naturally made to do, to remove an unviable pregnancy. It has nothing to do with you, what you did, or how you behaved during your pregnancy. Your body was able to identify there was an issue, and go through the work of releasing it. Our bodies are amazing in their abilities. It’s so crucial to trust in it during this time of healing too. This means you need to listen to the physical signs, whatever they may be, lean into them, and do what you need to do. Body scans throughout the day, continuing your affirmations or mantras, grounding, and other ways to become in tune with our bodies can help to repair that trust during this time. I can trust my body and my mind to work together.
Having a supportive group - whether it’s medical professionals, family, or therapy, make it someone who knows it was not your fault and who is ready to be there for you.
One of the most important tips to help heal is to find your support group, whoever it may be. But make sure they are supportive! There will always be someone who has a comment, but those who you imagine will be insensitive should be left out of the crucial healing time. That doesn’t mean you can’t tell them eventually, if you so choose. But during your most venerable time, you will want to surround yourself with the people who are available to hold space for you, to allow you to talk about it if you need to, who lack judgement, who are ready to serve you. Of course, if you are starting to feel like you should be healing and you aren’t, it might be time to seek out professional help if you haven’t already.
I hope these can help you as they helped me! I found so many miscarriage resources that just didn’t truly help as I had hoped so I wanted to include what worked for me. I truly believe doing all of these helped me heal and recover in a timely manner and I can only hope that it brings you comfort during this venerable time. Just know you aren’t alone and you are worthy!